Posts Tagged ‘Colorado’

I was watching “Dancing With the Stars” tonight when it showed a beautiful girl from Africa.

It told her story of how she was adopted as a very sick girl and brought to America. As soon as she had healed she began to dance, and what a beautiful, talented dancer she was.

She came on and performed to Natasha Bedingfield‘s “Wild Horses”; a song that has resonated with me since the first time I heard it.

My eyes teared as I watched this young lady dance to the song. I feel the meaning deep into my soul and understand what it’s like to look on the world and wish for the freedom of a wild horse, racing the wind on a precipice under a tumultuous sky. 

I think those of us with ADD will always have this feeling; we’re so full of ideas and thoughts, dreams and desires that it is physically impossible for me to carry out everything I daydream up in a single day.

Some of those dreams will never be accomplished.

I doubt I will ever fly to the moon, as I told my 5th grade teacher I would. I also seriously doubt I will ever stand in front of millions and sing my heart out, as I used to try to convince my parents. Climbing Mt. Everest is out, as I dreamed earlier today, though I haven’t thrown out traversing across Italy as on Eat, Pray, Love. And I have yet to believe I won’t live in Colorado one day (my husband on the other hand…).

It’s these dreams that find me wanting to “run with the wild horses” because that is where my mind is.

The truth is all this is that I already am running with the wild horses. I’m home free every time I type, every time I take one step closer to learning how I work differently than people without ADD, and every time I learn something new.

So here’s to running with the wild horses, hope you enjoy the video…I wish I had one of the girl on Dancing With the Stars. Sorry it isn’t up yet!

If you haven’t considered coaching, check out Dana Rayburn. I love my coach, she has truly changed the way I look at ADD!

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Doe behind my home 🙂

When I close my eyes and imagine the future, I see a brick house, surrounded by a sparse wood, or near a lake or pond, preferably on a hill or near some mountains…but I can’t have everything. 😉

Inside that house I see comfortable living room with my future kids watching a movie, eating popcorn with their friends. I see a large kitchen, a little messy, but set up for good use, perhaps with the remnants of a good meal waiting to be placed in the dishwasher I don’t have yet.

I see a master bedroom, french doors open to the outdoors where a small, private patio awaits my attention. A fire-pit, two large outdoor chairs, and a small table make the space feel cozy.

There I sit, Husband nearby, simmering cup of tea and computer in hand, immersed in my work, cool breeze playing with my hair. Perhaps the fire is going, perhaps I’m wrapped in a throw, perhaps this small outdoor room is simply off the kitchen, but that is where you’ll find me. Always writing, always where I can see outside.

There was a time I imagined these things, and threw out the idea. I wanted to live in Colorado, near a rushing river. Or I saw myself in the mountains of Montana, roughing that cold winter for the stunning summer to follow.

Perhaps no matter where you are it’s necessary to rough the winter and live for the summer. Don’t we all have cold winters? Even down here in Texas it freezes sometimes, deserts are bitterly cold at night, and the truth is I’m not sure if I could chill with snow.

For the first time in my life I’m not fighting my idea of the future. I’m still transitioning, but aren’t we all? Who in the world isn’t in a state of transition?

Maybe I just like where my life is heading. I like that I am in control of my surroundings, I like that I’m in control of my ADD, and I like that I’m finding peace in something I love.

Maybe all I needed this whole time was to believe in myself. Look what happened when I gave it all up.

As I type, fat deer are running across the field behind my house. As always I’m on the porch, enjoying the weather. Soon it will be 100 degrees and the mosquitoes will chase me back in, for now I’ll enjoy the pleasant weather and praise God we have it.

Until next time…