Misunderstanding

Posted: February 11, 2012 in Mental Health
Tags: , ,

It’s so frustrating to have ADD. To be the one who is disorganized amongst a sea of perfectionists.

I can handle my mess, but it became apparent today that it can (and will) be used against me in the court of people who think I’m a bum.

ADD is tough. People who learn my faults rarely take time to know the person behind them. Due to this, it is assumed that I am just being lazy, when honestly, I’m working harder than they can imagine!

Everyday I have to battle the inability to focus, then I have to fight just to keep that focus. It’s the equivalent of mental exhaustion, except all the time. Every now and then, I’ll be able to think clear and tackle all the little problems I can. But within a couple of hours that clarity fades and I’m left with fuzzy brain. Usually, I wake up with a fuzzy brain.

Anyway, on thing I need to learn to do is find a way to make known that I am continually working on myself and battling ADD, without making excuses for myself. In fact, I rarely tell those above me because saying, “Listen, I have ADD, please work with me,” seems to put me at a liability while I make excuses for myself.

So I don’t say anything. Then, when things are out of control nobody knows. It’s been a secret so I seem like a lazy, normal person.

This is a real problem. I don’t see a resolve for it. Definitely something to chat with my coach about, and perhaps until there is more awareness and less abuse of ADD or ADHD, then it won’t change.

I’ll let you know how it goes!

Dayna

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Comments
  1. expatlogue says:

    Hang in there. Remember, we’re all different, and those prissy perfectionist types might be just as trapped as you with a creeping capacity for OCD. I imagine, at the same time as being utterly appalling to them, your mess might be the kind of freedom from compulsion that they secretly crave. Flip-side of the coin.

    • Thank you. You have a point! The Stuff is getting better one room at a time, but it’s tough to learn how. 🙂 I wish the perfectionists understood that we aren’t all born with that capacity to be OCD. LOL!

  2. danarayburn says:

    Dayna, Ignore those folks who have Attention Surplus Syndrome – aka A.S.S. It takes time to learn and cement your new habits. Keep up the good work you’ve been doing and eventually you WILL have a new self-concept and others will see you differently, too. Don’t expect it all to happen in two weeks. PLEASE!!!

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